#1 Naked Noah
(Genesis 9:21)

Genesis 9:21
He (Noah) drank of the wine and became drunk and lay uncovered in his tent.

  (v20)Noah, over 600 years old, decides to sleep commando-style after getting drunk off his own vineyard’s stock.  The only man God saw righteous enough (6:8-9)(7:1)(2Peter2:5)to not commit genocide on (sorry, judgment), sleeping in the half-millennial buff drunk off his rocker.
  (v22)His youngest son, Ham, later discovered his father’s condition and told his two older brothers about it.  (v23)Not wanting to suffer the sight of ollllld plumbing swinging in the breeze, Shem and Japeth covered up dear old dad with a garment (someone’s least favorite robe, I’m sure).
  (v24-27)Noah soon “awoke from his wine” and, upon noticing the tacky Def Leppard jacket covering his ancient privates, cursed his youngest son and proclaimed a blessing upon the two eldest. 
  “Ham, for looking upon my old man balls, you shall be a servant of servants to your brothers!” 
  “Shem, Japeth, for concealing my old man balls, blessed be the Lord and may your brother be your servant!”
  (FUN FACT: verse 25 was brought up sometimes as one of the holy stamps of approval for slavery throughout American history.  Why? ..excellent question!)

  Was Noah upset that his son saw his wrinkly equipment or was it that Ham told his other brothers?  I hope I’m never in the position to be able to report to my brothers, “hey, dad’s blackout drunk in his room… … … totally naked.”

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